Sometimes I read people's post and I think..."Wow, you CANNOT be writing this for you! You are totally trying to write this to seem articulate or smart (or "deep"..depends how you take it..) or something! I mean seriously, ANYONE can use a thesaurus!" Heck, I used shift f7 (which brings up a list of better words than your own) on the majority of my papers, giving me a slightly better vocabulary than the next person, who did not know my trick. But still! I understand people blog for their own reason, but SERIOUSLY!
That may seem so out of focus, but at least I didn't look up proper grammar online! Its sad I started my blog complaining, since that was not at all my intention, but I read someone's (who shall remain nameless) that just got my blood flowing! And honestly their blog had good grammar and all, it was just annoying. Yeah I'm speaking in a hateful matter, I realize that. But God will take that up with me, back off.
These days I find it SO hard to find sincere people. I know more than half (of you 11 followers..) agree. It sucks so bad that you have your best friend in high school and you think y'all will hang out (or at least talk) every day, but of course that doesn't happen. Then you make new friends, but none of them compare. Those of you who know me know exactly who I am talking about. Michelle.
I am SO mad at myself that we are not as close as I have always imagined we would be. I don't blame me, or her, but rather time and maturity. That is not to say one of us is more mature, because deep down I think we will always be the same in that aspect, but I seriously think it was the process of growing up and finding ourselves apart from one another that separated us, and made us into the women we are to become. But now there is NOTHING more that I want than to go back, or at least pick up, where we left off. It is a scary thing, really. It is almost like establishing a new friendship, because we have missed so much! Wouldn't it be nice if we never even lost touch? And I don't think either one of us even realized it! If so, I think (and really, truly hope) that we would have put a stop to it. But that is enough of my whining and complaining, wishing and dwelling on the past. I am on to bigger and better things. Getting my best friend back, and living the life I have ALWAYS wanted...and deserved. I don't want my friends now who are reading this to become upset or hurt with my sudden need for having Michelle back in my life. I don't want them thinking they are not good enough, because my friends now are WONDERFUL friends, but lets face it, no one can compare to the person God put on this Earth for you (and their family...yada yada). We all have that one person. Again, that may seem wrong, all I mean to say is...I have THE perfect puzzle, my friends now offer me more than I could ever want and I am eternally grateful, and always always always want them in my life, but I am missing one piece, Michelle. So please, don't be angry or hurt, or judgmental. Just be understanding of a girl who really misses her best friend.
Devon
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